I'm Not a Violent Guy
DR. WALLACE: Amanda and I had been dating for over seven months and we were
quite serious. Then one evening I did something stupid, and we got into a huge
argument. She was yelling at me. When she called me stupid, I slapped her in the
face so hard that her glasses fell off. When I took her home, she said that she
never wanted to see me again. The next day, her father called me and said that
if I ever got near his daughter again, he would cause me great pain.
I really miss Amanda, and I know that she misses me because I think she
really loves me. I'm truly sorry for my stupid mistake, and I know it will be
hard to get her back. I'm asking you how I'm going to succeed in getting her to
forgive me, and I know she will forgive me. I'm not a violent guy. This is the
first time I ever slapped a girl. I don't know what came over me to hurt the one
I love. - Nameless, Sacramento, Calif.
NAMELESS: Your cowardly behavior with your ex-girlfriend is unforgivable! You
are fortunate that you didn't wind up in jail because you deserved time behind
bars. Don't waste your time pursuing Amanda because she's not going to return to
you. Instead, spend your time taking an anger management class, and then behave
as a gentleman should when you are in the company of a lady. Consider yourself
fortunate that Amanda's father only threatened you with "great pain." Some
fathers wouldn't have been so lenient!
WONDERFUL WAY TO COMMUNICATE WITH PARENTS
DR. WALLACE: I have found a wonderful way to communicate with parents when
emotions are running high. Instead of yelling, crying or slamming a door, I go
to my room and write them a letter expressing my thoughts. Sometimes I write
them a poem when I feel creative. It really works!
I don't always get my way, but my parents at least understand my views, and
they do their best to explain why the answer is "no." I'd like to encourage all
teens to give my method a try. It's effective and it keeps nerves from getting
shattered. - Nameless, McComb, Miss.
NAMELESS: Excellent idea! The power of the pen can never be underestimated.
WE ARE TIRED OF MAKING UP
DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend and I want our "on-again, off-again," relationship
to be on all the time. We are tired of making up. We say that we love each
other, but yet we have problems. What do we need to do to have an "always happy"
relationship? - Nameless, Talladega, Ala.
NAMELESS: I firmly believe that open and honest communication is the most
essential ingredient in any healthy relationship. When a couple can discuss any
situation, it eliminates doubt, innuendos and suspicion. Effective communication
is the result of trust, friendship and love. In the absence of trust, a
relationship can find anger with no love whatsoever.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to
reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this
column. Email him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert
Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists,
visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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