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A recent
national survey revealed
something pretty shocking
about America's parents.
The No. 1 subject they
least want to talk to
their kids about is sex.
Wrong. Try
again.
The No. 1
subject parents least want
to talk to their kids
about
is ... the
federal deficit? Texting
while showering? Wait! It
must be drugs and alcohol.
Wrong again.
The No. 1 taboo
subject for parents is
their kids' weight. About
5 percent of parents in a
recent WebMD/Sanford
survey think it's tough to
talk about drugs and
alcohol. About 10 percent
get very squirmy when it
comes to discussing sex.
But a whopping 25 percent
are hesitant to talk to
kids about how much they
weigh. In fact, many
parents of 8- to
17-year-olds confess they
avoid the weight
conversation altogether.
Meanwhile, our
children are exploding. A
third of U.S. kids are
overweight, and 17 percent
are already obese. That
translates to millions of
kids showing signs of
early heart disease,
diabetes, high blood
pressure and a slew of
other medical issues that
take our current health
care crisis and blow it up
into a national
catastrophe.
"These
statistics are not
surprising, but they are
tragic," says Sarah Stone,
co-creator of the
MindStream Academy, where
teens and tweens go to
learn about being healthy,
fit and self-confident.
Parents who are afraid,
reluctant or insecure
about having that weight
talk with their kids are
making a big mistake, she
says. It's time to stop
stalling and start a
dialogue, no matter how
difficult it is to get the
ball rolling.
"Parents
inevitably bring their own
feelings about weight to
the table, which can
prevent meaningful
discussion," Stone says.
"Often they too feel
helpless and not in a
position to give advice."
Which is why so
many parents leave it to
their doctors to bring up
the subject. Fat chance.
Teachers? School
counselors? Priests and
rabbis? Those
conversations just don't
happen. Stone's bottom
line is this: "Parents
control the health
environment and establish
the wellness culture in
the
family. ...
Avoiding the subject is a
terrible abrogation of
parental responsibility."
I'll say. Which
is why I'm sharing some of
Stone's tips about what
works and what doesn't
when it comes to getting
kids to live a healthier
lifestyle:
PUT THE FOCUS
ON HEALTH, NOT WEIGHT.
What kind of food is
served in the house? Do
you emphasize physical
activity? Is everyone
getting enough sleep?
Parents need to establish
a wellness culture in the
house, Stone says, so the
dialogue is more about
healthy lifestyle
behaviors and less about
weight loss and diets.
ASK YOUR CHILD
WHAT WOULD HELP. This is
crucial. Though the parent
is the authority figure,
it's not helpful to assume
you know the best way to
help your child become
healthier. Get your child
involved in coming up with
the best course of action.
Practice deep listening.
Ask open-ended, not
yes-no, questions. Don't
give answers — listen
for them.
DON'T BE
JUDGMENTAL. Don't blame
your child. If they feel
attacked, they'll stop
listening. The fact is, we
live in a fat culture, and
the majority of Americans
are overweight. The focus
should be on how you can
help your kid move
forward, expressed as
lovingly as possible.
FOCUS ON
CHANGE, EVEN IF YOU RUN
INTO RESISTANCE. Get your
child to make a commitment
to just one change in the
next week. Walking three
days a week? Drinking
fewer sodas? Success at
achieving small goals
gives kids confidence, and
from that place, healthier
habits can take hold.
OBSERVE HOW
YOUR CHILD (AND THE WHOLE
FAMILY) USES FOOD. Does
your kid use food to hide
fear or disappointment?
Deal with stress? If you
can share your awareness
of these emotional
triggers to overeating,
the problem becomes more
manageable, Stone says.
WALK THE TALK.
The example you set is the
single best way to change
your kid's behavior. If
you eat smart, exercise
often, don't smoke and
deal with stress in
healthy ways, your kids
are more likely to do the
same.
IF YOU CAN'T
GET THROUGH? Get help,
Stone says. A doctor, a
friend, a teacher ... but
don't give up. Your
child's health is too
important.
ENERGY
EXPRESS-O! HAVE THAT TALK
TODAY
"Letting
children continue to feel
shame, humiliation and
embarrassment because you
don't want to talk is only
compounding the problem.
... Remember, not facing a
fire doesn't put it out."
— Sarah Stone
Marilynn Preston —
fitness expert, personal
trainer and speaker on
healthy lifestyle issues —
is the creator of Energy
Express, the
longest-running syndicated
fitness column in the
country. She has a
website, http://marilynnpreston.com
and welcomes reader
questions, which can be
sent to MyEnergyExpress@aol.com.
To find out more about
Preston and read features
by other Creators
Syndicate writers and
cartoonists, visit the
Creators Syndicate website
at www.creators.com.
COPYRIGHT 2011 ENERGY
EXPRESS, LTD.
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS
SYNDICATE INC.
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